AIMES, courtland allister

[courtland allister aimes]

COURTLAND ALLISTER AIMES ,

giddy, loving, cautious, trans/gay, abused

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BASIC INFORMATION

NAME: Courtland Allister Aimes
NICKNAMES: ~Court, it's just a shortened version of his full name
~Bubbles, he is a very boisterous and uplifted person (this was also what his friends chose would be his stripper name if he were ever to be one)
AGE&GRADE: freshman/fifteen
BIRTHDAY: August 21, 1995
GENDER: male
CLIQUE: scene
PLAY-BY: Izzy Hilton

PERSONALITY

LIKES:~Flashy (girls') clothes
~hairspray
~small, furry animals
~boys
~dance music
~bright colors
~school
~his Sidekick
DISLIKES: ~his father
~home
~judgemental people
~metal music
~having male parts
~death
~Twilight fangirls
HOPES: to one day get his gender reassignment surgery, his father would die/leave him alone, that he graduates and moves away
FEARS: someone finding out what happens at home, that his mother will reject him if she ever found out, that he will never find love
SECRET: "There isn't a day that goes by when he doesn't make me cry."
PERSONALITY:
giddy- He is a very happy person when away from his home. It's when he feels the safest and can just let go and be himself. Himself is a little giddy girl.
loving- Courtland has the biggest heart you will ever find. He feels the need to be loved by someone other than his mother and therefore extends that love onto other people to try and receive it back.
cautious- All his life, he has been hurt by someone really close to him. This has caused him to be cautious with who he trusts and what he does. Though he doesn't do this visibly; he usually tries to hide that he's kind of scared of people. He is especially careful around older men around his father's age.
trans/gay- Ever since he was a young age, Court has been acting more like a girl than a boy. He dressed like in a feminine way and took an interest in boys when puberty hit. So in a way he is transexual, though his parents won't allow him to take hormones. Which kind of makes him gay because he only crossdresses so far.
abused- Court's father has sexually abused him since he was a very small child. He has no control over stopping it and hides this from everyone.

APPEARANCE

EYES: In Courtland's eyes are a hidden fear. Inside, he is a scared little girl. This sometimes shows through his eyes, but he's gotten good at hiding it. The gorgeous orbs are a dark brown and they are usually lined with black.
HAIR: His hair is naturally brunette, though he bleaches it. He wears it long and in a scene style. Sometimes he will put it up or curl it - do something girly with it.
PIERCING/S: septum, nose and earrings
TATTOO/S: zero
OVERALL: Courtland considers himself scene, but he is young yet. He does use elements of the scene style in his dress, but it is also more fashion forward that that. He uses a high class version of this style. He likes to dress with lots of bling and sparkles and high heels. Pretty much, he likes to feel like he is a girl and goes over the top to do so.

BIOGRAPHY

MOTHER: Alisha Pettyfer, 38, ad designer
FATHER: Jack Aimes, 41, car salesman
SIBLING/S: zero
OTHER/S: pomeranian puppy, Fuzzbutt, 1
OVERALL: When Courtland was born, it was the least hectic time in his life. Then he had to get older and things had to get complicated. Before he was even old enough to comprehend much of anything, his parents got divorced. Apparently they fell out of love. It was a common thing that happened pretty much all the time, they said. This was really hard for the young kid to understand, though. What was going to happen to his mommy?

Alisha wasn't there really to see most of the strange things going on with Court. All she knew, she heard over the phone from her little studio appartment in LA. She was convinced it was just a phase. Her little boy would stop dressing in girls' clothes and playing with dolls after he got used to her being away. Jack tried has hard as he could to go along with this and make the boy do boy things.

But that didn't work. In his heart, he felt he was a girl. Therefore, he did girl things. His parents couldn't change him because this was who he was. And when Jack accepted this, he started to get even closer to his son in a way fathers aren't supposed to be close to their children. He began touching him inappropriately. That's all it began as were touches. But it progressed because Courtland kept it all quiet. Why would he tell his classmates or teachers that his daddy liked him with his pants off? Plus, Daddy promised him things for being quiet. It was their secret game. He couldn't spoil it or he wouldn't get toys and candy and vacations.

So it went on. And it got worse and worse. First it was small objects that his father would press inside him. Those kind of hurt and felt weird. He didn't understand. And then it was a new toy - Jack told him it was a rabbit. He could pet the bald rabbit but if he scared it, the rabbit would shake and hide inside of him. That hurt more than the objects. But it kinda felt good. This wasn't something he felt good about, though. It made him scared and ashamed.

As Court grew into his teenage years, Jack took it to the next level. He himself started to rape his child. His father was so big. It wasn't comfortable. After it happened, he couldn't move, was bleeding and cried for hours. Over and over, the man told him he loved him so much. That this was still just their game. He couldn't tell anyone. Which he didn't. He was too ashamed of it and didn't know what would happen if he said something. Alisha never caught on because she lived in a different state and hardly ever visited. But this went on pretty much everyday for most of his life. Courtland didn't like it at all, but what could he do? Everytime he tried to stop his father, it just got worse and Jack got more angry.

Court buried all of his home life. He never talked about the bad things and never brought anyone home. The reason for the latter being that he was afraid Jack would harm his friends as well. Then they would really be in trouble. Instead, he found home in his friends and at school. Usually, he hung out with the older, high school kids because the ordeals with his family life made him more mature. He despised all the people his age who got the chance to live and go through puberty normally. His best friend was Clark Whitaker. They both leaned on each other, but Clark did it more visibly. The two of them talked everyday about life and just trying to make it through.

Apparently, Clark couldn't make it, though. His death shattered Courtland. This boy was the only person out there that knew what Jack did to him every night. And then he was gone. Now who was he supposed to turn to? There was no one to keep him sane and make him think that he would make it through. He was all alone now, which put him in a funk. Though, this he hid from the world, too. Yes, he went through the grieving process aloud. But once Clark was buried, Court returned to how things used to be. Except he was alone now and still in the same shitty mess.

CREATOR

NAME/ALIAS: Jesse
EXPERIANCE: 2 short/long years
FOUND US: i created it yo
ROLEPLAY SAMPLE:

Enclosed in the closet Braedon felt safe. The darkness enveloped him so fully that he felt one with it. A place where he finally belonged. Despite the steadily growing warm puddle around him, he shivered immensely. Sleep was promised only minutes away. A permanent fix to suffering. Somewhere outside the house, not too far from the boy's hideaway, the pops of fireworks were exploding for happy families. They would all be spending their Independence Day jovially together. While Braedon hid out in my closet, the rest of his family were off not caring that they were missing yet another holiday.

But this night was of freedom for him too. The note and drenched razor clutched weakly to his chest told of that. Soon sweet release would come and he'd be numb forever. Never having to feel anymore.

With a sigh of relief, Braedon gave in to the night. His eyes shut softly, totally oblivious to the pain being brought on by the release causing this to happen. The felicity he felt outweighed all other senses.

The last he remembered was that one firework seemed bigger than the others. Somehow the light filled his hovel and screamed his name loudly and in a high-pitched fashion. It seemed fitting for that to be his last memory. Making it seem like someone was caring about his end. Even if he only made it up for himself.

Joel,

I don't need to tell you how fucked up my life is. You know; after all you're the only one who's ever been there for me. And I appreciate it a lot. But I can't stay alive for only one person's appreciation. No one else seems to want me here and I have no qualms with ridding the world of myself. So, that's why I'm gone. Thanks for being the best friend I could ever ask for.

Love,
Braedon

P.S. Tell mother and father never to reproduce again.


So cold. Everything was so cold. So this was dying? It wasn’t so bad….

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Groaning at the aches all over his body, Braedon opened his eyes to an unfamiliar room. Wait, I'm waking up? I'm not supposed to be able to do that anymore. Nor feel. Something went wrong.... He looked around, then down at himself. His wrists were bandaged and an IV was stuck in his forearm, providing him with the blood he'd lost. He was warm again….

Long and loud his scream pierced the hospital.

Nurses came rushing into his room, trying to retrain his thrashing body. And then someone else was there. Someone familiar. He pushed past the women. "Braedon…. I'm here…. Calm down." Tears were in his eyes.

Braedon looked up at Joel's voice, shaking. The nurses now had complete control over body. He lay prostrate. "Joel, I'm not supposed to be here. I just want to be dead. Tell them to let me die, please?" he pleaded of his friend, no longer having the strength to struggle.

"No, Brae. I'm not going to let you die or kill yourself. Just calm down. Please...." He pulled out the note. In the fold was Braedon's razor. He held up the shining object. "This has to stop. Please. Losing you would be torture."

It looked so inviting.

He immediately whimpered and lunged at the razor. But the nurses held fast, and soon he was being sedated. "No...please," he pleaded, slipping into the black.

It enveloped him, so sweetly. Taking him under from the pain of living.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hours later, Braedon drifted back to consciousness. An unfair, unwelcoming place to be in. He was dully aware of the slight throbbing coming from his wrists. Moaning he clutched the sheets and pulled them up to hide him. They came up slightly short, though. He just wanted to be alone.

From where he was resting in a chair next to his friend, Joel's eyes opened slowly. "Braedon. You're awake." He held fast to the other boy’s hand, smiling softly up at him. Though fright was visibly shining in those golden orbs. He was scared for Braedon’s life. If he were to lose this boy, nothing good could come. He’d be alone once more. How could he possibly handle that?

Braedon took his hand back, placing it on his stomach. He didn't know why, but Joel holding it gave him an odd feeling. Like someone wanted him here in this world still. He didn’t like feeling like that. Not after he’d tried to kill himself. "Unfortunately. I'm not supposed to be." He glared over at his friend, wordlessly blaming him for keeping him in this horrible world.

Joel looked down, "I wasn't going to sit there and watch you die!" His hands fisted in his lap, tears sliding down his cheeks, "You're my only friend; what would I do without you?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Find new, worthier friends maybe?" Braedon coughed a bit, feeling dizzy. "I hate this. It sucks. Next time just let me go, kay?" He settled back into the pillows, staring up at the ceiling.

The truth behind his harshness was because he was about to cry, too, but didn't want to. To show that he hurt would be to care. And to feel. All the boy wanted was to feel dead. Not to be like this – all alive and ready to bawl his eyes out.

[//JESSICA ANNE\\]

ACCEPTED!

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~Welcome! Love, Jesse~[/center]